Grey = ?

I think... i really have changed... but i dono when did i changed...

after my birthday?
after CNY? after Valentine ?

Am i  insane already ? or  .... i cannot be trusted anymore ?

i wish i would have known what monster have i turn into...

i just know one thing... my old pain that everynights haunts me like a ghost... came back... is that a mistake that i study form6 ?

i only feel grey colour around me.... zzz.... no other colours...